nothing could aptly describe. no one can rightly challenge. no soul could seemly defy. welcome to my world. where i make the rules and you stick by them.

About Me

Standing by, All the way. Here to help you through your day. Holding you up, When you are weak, Helping you find what it is you seek. Catching your tears, When you cry. Pulling you through when the tide is high. Absorbing your voice When you talk. Standing by when you learn to walk. Just being there, Through thick and thin, All just to say, you are my friend.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

You may be a person in this world, but for someone you are the world.

Can I rest here for a million years?

We can go there together





有一种感觉叫蔓延~




林中有两条小路都忘不到头
我来到岔路口伫立了好久
一个人不能同时选择两条征途
我选择了这一条
却说不出理由

也许另一条小路它并不长
掩埋在没有脚印的落叶下
那就留给别的人们以后去走吧
我选择了这一条
就一直要走

世界上最长和最短的距离是什么?
有人说,是我站在你面前,却不知道我爱你。
有人说,是前一秒和后一秒那永不可能相聚的悲哀

这样也好,前一秒会永远记得后一秒的好

那一直向远处蔓延着的,是一种不愿承认的东西

延曲折,让人想起了周华健的歌——
“曲折的心情有人懂,怎么能不感动”。
可有时候,仅有感动是不够的。

毕竟那路的远近和半途布满的荆棘,
决定了我们是否能在夕落前赶回家。

即使没有任何屏障,这样的路,你敢走么?


世上的路有千万条,那蔓延着的,又岂止这种种形态

石制的,木制的……
或干脆没有任何外在点缀,
踏上去叽叽作响,混着心,一个频率。
不小心踏歪,心跳也就跟着颤了。

同是蔓延,给人的感觉也不同,或暖或冷。
喜欢在这样一个林间小道数片片落叶,听声声飞鸟。

看那夕阳西下,日暮人归
让它一直的蔓延下去……




I am following the typhoon

Yes, in another 9 hours, I will be headed for a mad rush to the airport. I have spent the entire evening preparing for this trip. The entire evening deciding what to bring and how best to fit all these things in, into an already crammed army bag. It feels like going to war. I packed a first aid kid, resisted the temptation to bring valium along, not of much use anyway. I spent the evening walking with my parents, talking to them, knowing that I will miss them when I am away. I always miss those near to me when I am away. The longing actually starts before the trip. The knowledge that I will not see them for more than a week, not see YOU for more than a week, not see my uncle for more than a week, is a reminder of the importance you all are to me. I have a test tomorrow, some sort of test about different types of communication. I had missed all lectures and only attended one tutorial for this course. This kind of sums up my attitude towards my first academic year in NUS.I did not fail, though considering the amount of effort I put in, I should. And I had not expected much. ALl that does not matter , I passed, just a figure in the average, but that gives me a clean slate to start next year. A new year as the Captain of the Judo club. Any way , back to my packing, and the preparations for the trip. This time we were responsible for our own planning. This is so different from the trip I made in Dec last year. The planning was fun, bordering on tediousness and adventurous. We had to work within out budget, no more sponsors this time. With luck, we found an extremely cheap airline, hopefully the planes are functionally not reflective of the price of the tickets. I had just watched Poisedon yesterday, with something really precious in my arms. I certainly have no wish to experience the same kind of race for survival at a few thousands miles above ground. And even if disaster strikes, I do not think I have a bit of chance, with my enormous mass, I will be headed for ground in record time. I called the one I lub. LUB DUB LUB DUB, without me around, maybe my lub can find solace in this blog. In a beat of the heart. SO we will be tranversing the whole of Taiwan, sounds cool, considering each train or bus trip planned for is planne for without much room for error. I would think that missing any would set us back by at least a day. Well, take it easy, I am going for a holiday, not a war. Not a truly well deserved holiday though. I have been on holiday since the start of school and what a grand holiday it has been. Usually when I am away from my blog, I would think of plenty I can write here. My thoughts would just wonder, just like the clouds as they drift over you, cover you in shadows and when you expect them to hang around, they are gone and you are basked in sunlight again. What glorious sunlight, what warmth and the glare that hurts. It seems so naturally you expect it to last, it too is replaced. I have been downloading song s that I can enjoy on the plane. Out of no where my comp starts playing this touching tune and I cannot find the player item. SHall I bother about that?Don't think so, my eyes are real tired. I will miss PI PI, but some one said something about absence and fondness right? Bon vovage!

A song i downloaded for my trip

親愛的聽眾朋友我是你的代班DJ
想找你陪我一起聊聊這世界
整天的工作重覆疲憊的畫面
麻木你的感覺

耳邊才剛剛聽到仇恨要靠理智解決
謾罵和子彈卻在那頭滿天飛
學了一輩子的愛沒勇氣說出來
彌補那些傷害

你和我 在世界同一座擂台
別懦弱 拿出勇氣對待
讓眼淚 流出來不是因為失敗
幸福那個夢 就看你和我
你和我 你和我

美麗的主播說的都不是美麗的新聞
彩色的報紙能讓鮮血更逼真
當美麗播報的全是絕望的氣氛
誰該負點責任

那麼多的人只敢窩在網路裡面生存
慢慢都忘記電腦螢幕沒靈魂
科技的發達讓人的距離被拉開
再也拉不回來


你和我 在世界同一座擂台
別懦弱 拿出勇氣對待
讓眼淚 流出來不是因為失敗
幸福那個夢 就看你和我
你和我 你和我 你和我 (我們做得到yeah)

你和我也沒什麼不一樣 該學習地球如何分享
為什麼我們會忘記怎麼擁有簡單的大愛

that's right,
你和我
我們都要做的更好
你和我 在世界同一座擂台
別懦弱 拿出勇氣對待
讓眼淚 流出來不是因為失敗
幸福那個夢 就看你和我
你和我 你和我 你和我 你和我 你和我
(c'mon now 一起唱now 我們做得到 now 這個世界就是)

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

The joy of one is almost always the suffering of another

Thursday, May 11, 2006




想 你 ☆ 是 我 最 简 单 的 幸 福



我不知道流星能飞多久
值不值得追求

我不知道樱花能开多久
值不值得等候

我知道你我的情缘能像樱花般美丽

像恒星般永恒
值得我用一生去保留






如果落叶能寄去我所有的思念
我情愿将整个秋林装进我心中
如果归雁能传递我所有的思念
我会用毕生去感谢这美的季节



孤独时仰望蓝天 你是最近的那朵白云
寂寞时凝视夜空 你是最亮的那颗星星
闲暇时漫步林中 你是擦肩的那片绿叶
疲惫时安然入睡 你是最美的那段梦境



我设想着有你陪伴的幸福日子
我设想着有你照顾的温馨生活
我设想着有你笑声的每个角落
我设想着只属于我们俩的代号



有一种感觉总在难眠时才承认是相思
有一种缘份总在梦醒后才相信是永恒
有一种心情总在离别后明白是失落
有一种目光总在分手后才相信是眷恋



相识是最珍贵的缘分
思念是最美丽的心情
牵挂是最真挚的心动
问候是最动听的语言
知音最完美的深交
知己是最贴心的默契
你是我心中最美丽的相遇……



Friday, May 05, 2006

So many trips, so many camps, one Judo club, so many tuitions and only me.

Shall plan the itinery for Russia. Departing on the 22nd of this month. I only know Gideon from the group who are going.Moscow.Places to visit:Kremlin à enough said I think … (open 10am to 5pm, closed on Thursday. Admissions is US$8 à. students (ISIC) half price and another $10 to the armoury. Tours are available for US$20 including admissions to both Kremlin and armoury so I think it may be a better option.Red square – entered via Resurrection Gate. See chapel of the iverian virgin. lenin’s tomb (open to public from 10am to 1pm except Monday and Friday, free admission) St Basil’s Cathedral. State History Museum à history of Russian civilization (open to public 11am to 7pm except Tuesday admission US$1 according to lonely planet but US$5 according to rough guide). Kitay-gorod à financial district with many interesting buildings and architecture. KGB Museum à but requires joining of a group tour Patriarshy Dom. GUM and TsUM à big departmental stores à not really to buy things, but can see just like visiting harrod’s in London. I think the area around red square will take 2 or 3 days. Can take another day to walk round the rest of the city: Pushkinsky square à shows a section of the Boulevard ring which is a ring of open spaces and nice buildings surrounding the city centre. Skyscraper at Kudrinskaya ploshchad 1 à one of Stalin’s neo-Gothic buildings (called Seven Sisters). Moscow’s White House à place where Yeltsin rallied the opposition to Gorbechev.Gorky Park.Tretyakov Gallery à 62 rooms of artwork. That was what pigeon came up with. WOnderful, shall try to look up more things.

Bangkok next month, on some weekend with my JC friends. I have been tasked with planning as well. Saikang warrior ! Long live the SK Warrior!. BUt i Must admit it would be fun having people you know so well( or at least you used to) with you. Then again, we can always make fun of how *********** ( most negative adjectives fit) Sayanee is.

When I get back, in the early weeks of June, I shall have to start planning for Combined Martial Arts Display and the ODAC camp.

Then it would be taiwan and hongkong. More or less those involved are cleared. so we are free to enjoy ourselves. An entitlement. I shall work on that tomorrow afternoon as well. BUt i shall miss the WORLD CUP!!! Hopefully they have the channels over in TAIWAN... I really pray.

Then it shall be ODAC camp, 4th of july for the dry run and 10th to 13th for the actual event. After which shall be MEdic camp, 17th July till school opens. So much planning before that.

Judo first meeting after I am elected would be next monday. It was something like a walkover, the elections, no opponents, no divided opinions and vehement dissent. I have been drafting out the agenda for the year, hope it would give the club a lift. A new look.

WHat about my tuition kids, 6 of them. I am glad exam is not around the corner for them, but since I will be away for 10 days each trip, I can still schedule them for tuitions on an alternate day. CT asked how do I have money for so many trips, I guess that by charging exorbitant rates for tuition, I somehow managed to survive. Value for money anyway.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Impermutable rules

People who are different are dangerous; they belong to another tribe, they want our lands and our women.
We must marry, have children, reproduce the species.
Love is only a small thing, enough for one person, and any suggestion that the heart might be larger than this is considered perverse.
When we marry, we are authorized to take possession of the other person, body and soul.
We must do jobs we detest because we are part of an 9orgainized society. And if everyone did what they wanted to do, the world would come to a standstill.
We must buy jewellery, it identifies us with our tribe, just as body-piercing identifies those of a different tribe.
We must be amusing at all times and sneer at those who express their real feelings; it is dangerous for a tribe to allow members to show their feelings.
We must at all costs avoid saying NO because people prefer those who always say YEs, and this allows us to survive in a hostile territory.
What other people think is more important than what we feel.
Never make a fuss, it might attract the attention of a enemy tribe.
If you behave differently, you will be expelled from the tribe. because you could infect others and destroy something that was extremely difficult to organize in the first place.
We must always consider thelook of our new cave and if we do not have a clear idea of our own, then we must call in a decorator who will do his best to show others that good taste we have.
We must eat three meals a day even if we are not hungry, and when we fail to fit the current ideal of beauty we must fast, even if we are starving.

I have a dream.





I have a dream and that is to own all these watches. I do not wear accessories, I do not color match my clothes, I do not believe in any sophisticated beauty. A simple watch, the metallic lure, the rhythmic ticking of the dials. That is the most sexy decoration one can adorn. My collection right now is of little monetary value. But still the elegance and practicality brings me joy to no end. Who says man needs clothes? I say, bare it all save for that beauty of a beast on your wrist.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

everyone knows

I love the sea, the sand and the wind. How better to appreciate all that than to be in the middle of the sea. To be in a small kayak, to close your eyes and feel yourself drifting among the waves. Did so in Bintan, did so again today.
Most people are finishing the last few days of agony. Survivors. Had this circle of trust meeting in the sea, kayaks side by side and we let our conversation carry our imagination and the waves carry our kayaks. Why are people so interested in tragedies or miracles? will the ripples of the improbable stir the curiosity to such a huge extent? Most likely.
Almost everyone is happy now. Both veron and lijuan have their boyfriends, though danny is still single but as mother to a squirrel, i would not expect him to have much time for relationships. I still remember it was not long ago the 3 of them set up some alliance of singles, vowing to snub any possible relationships because they are jaded and disillusioned. I always thought that would be a passing phase. People do grow up. I know quite alot of secrets here and there, I always have a keen nose for juicy news. In return I trade personal information, and is that not what everyone does while gossiping? I tell them who I like, who I am with, who confessed to me, who is guilty of an affair with another and so on. It is thrilling for them because a little knowledge is always exciting.
Nothing serious, just idle. Nothing important, just curious. I like to critisize others. Not a desirable trait. I should start making myself the target of these caustic observations. Maybe, just maybe. But meanwhile, why does some idiot write some daft email? Roll my eyes.
Someone asked me to go on radio, interview by some AJ alumni . of course it had been selly who will be having exams. I would not go, who wants to be interviewed by a male DJ? My experiences with Desmond koh has been enough. Jamie teo might be able to change my mind, but then again is she a DJ?
So many friends to meet and so little time. Is there 2 months or 3 months of holidays? aKAN datang