Hold my hand... I am not part of the mad mad world.

Compassion remains a very important thing in the society today. An important virtue but yet gradually forgotten because we are blinded to the needs of others. Most of us are caught in the pursuit of high ideals, that the most basic virtues are sometimes neglected or overshadowed by dignity or professionalism.
What ever.
So yesterday night was one of the most interesting nights I had. Straight to the point.
I heard the commotion at 10pm. This guy S had barged into the medical centre, his friend and an instructor were trying to restrain him.
There were a lot of shouting and screaming from the 3 of them.
My immediate thoughts were : oh damn it! i am f*cked! Why must it happen tonight? I had no idea wat was going of. But looking at the trio, one guy waving his fist and shouting hysterically at the other two..
Of coz any self doubt and shock were concealed as I ran towards the 3 of them trying to make sense of what was happening.
S had sat down on the ground, sobbing and screaming that he does not wish to go detention barracks, he still wishes to go uni, to go to work.
A case of desperation it seems. Stressed out by the unfeeling system. Or a system that is neutral, but because of imbeciles around, unfeeling and non-thinking chaps just trying to make a living.
On closer look, his wrist had multiple cuts across, non were fatal, no blood spurting out, it appears his will to live remains somewhat intact. He may be violent, but I am sure I can overcome him.
In such a scenario, intuition tells me he listens to reason. I can help him, behind those eyes filled with hot tears, behind those waving arms and above all his shouting and screaming, maybe he is trying to tell the world he needs help.
Had i realli felt that way or was it just retrospection fixing up fragments of my memories?
I went to him and grabbed him, not in a menacing sense, but like a friend, someone who cares for him.. who is worried that he is injured.. who is trying to stop him from hurting himself.
My judo training made my first attempt largely successful. Before he could react, I had my left hand on his upper left forearm and the other hand across his back on his right arm. A sort of embrace, taking him into my arms.
I whispered in a hushed but firm manner : what is happening? I am here to help you, you are safe now.
The exact words were lost, left in the darkness of the night. I had said so much assuring words that their exact order were impossible to be recalled.
I look at his arm.. I told him. You are hurt, let me help you. I told him, I will protect you, I will keep those people who are trying to hurt you away from you.
My friend C was still sleeping away. Despite the commotion, he had chosen to continue with his sleep. May the world perish, he was thinking. And his sleep is of the highest importance.
I had to shake him out of his slumber. Told him to get me gauze and what is necessary for bandaging S's wounds.
And guess what he got for me? Exactly what I had told him.. gauze and nothing else. He had expect me to sterilize the wounds with my saliva and wrap up his arm with my skin it seems.
What an unbelievable idiot.
I had to get the centrimide, WOW bandage and scissors myself. I was too involved at that time to get pissed of. Matter at hands were more important.
S had tried banging his head against the wall. And I stoppd him. using my hand as the shock absorber. i asked him what was wrong? No one is going to send him to DB. HE is safe. I will help him
it is my role to help him and no one will be allowed to hurt him.
By now he had shrunken and sat against the wall. Muttering incoherent stuff.
Muttering stuff like the demon is in them, lonewolf is coming. In order to kill lonewolf , I had to kill him. He asked for needles and knife, for anything that can help him end his life. the world is coming to an end.
It was an outburst common to most people. Like a child who is throwing tantrums... maybe i am over simplifying things. but he does resemble one.. except that coming from an adult.. especially one that had just cut his wrist repeatedly and had assualted his friends and instructors.. it seemed diabolical and terrifying.
someoen thought i had calmed him down. and offered him a cup of water. He promptly threw the cup onto the ground, claiming that the water is poisonous.
By then I had realised what was wrong with him. But of coz, if i had outrightly made it known. He would just continue with his actions and maybe resort to more drastic actions.
He was stressed out, no doubt, he had thought of many alternatives.. to his problem but none seem feasible. So this was one last desperate measure.. This is a calculated move.. but despite saying that, you would have to lose certain control of your mind in order to act that crazy.
I had said so many assuring words to him. Asked him if Dr chris cheok or Bosco lee or Ang was his psychiatrist? Was he seeing any doctor, who does he wish to see right now?
I assured him countless of times..finally managed to convince him to go with me to a nearby medical centre where there is a attending doctor around.
His instructors were afraid him might jump off the ambulance.. but yet they were wwary of him.. afraid that he might just attack them.
SO I sat beside him.. of coz i would want to sit beside him. I had established myself as a friend of his.. maybe not a friend but the only trustworthy person apparent in those circumstances.